SAN DIEGO, CA –– Having not heard from him in nearly two days, Alice Tomlinson called her 32-year-old son, Ryan, to check in. But when the call went to voicemail, she began spewing out literally anything and everything that popped into her head.
BUDAPEST, HUNGARY — Although she was very excited to tag along at first, 27-year-old Jenny Wilson found her trip with Instagram travel-blogging legend Brittany Sentel (aka @livefreely246) to be a “complete snooze-fest.”
There are a few reasons to go from a full beard to a clean shave. Maybe you have a big job interview, or maybe your significant other finds it repulsive and you’re more interested in eventually having sex again than you're interesting in winning this battle of facial hair.
But hey, it took a long time to grow that puppy out! It would be a crime to just shave it all off in one swoop. In fact, it goes in several phases.
1. FULL BEARD
I thought it looked good. Like a rugged lumberjack! This beard made me feel like I could build things out of wood and change my own oil! Oh well, here it goes…
I’ve heard that step one of the road to recovery is to be honest with yourself, so here it goes:
I, like so many others, am addicted to my iPhone.
Way too often, I catch myself scrolling through the same Facebook, Twitter and Instagram feeds I’ve already gone through just a few minutes before — scouring posts of friends out to dinner, or at a fun-looking bar, or at a beach with their feet showing at the bottom of the picture.
Then I’ll look over, see my wife sitting next to me doing the same thing and think, “oh, we haven’t spoken in 20 minutes. Kinda forgot you were there, actually.”
You probably don’t remember me, but we ran into each other at the Whole Foods salad bar recently. Well, we didn’t exactly run into each other – I saw your perfectly coordinated orange outfit, turned to my fiancé and said, “Holy shit I’ll be right back, I have to take a picture of that fuckin’ guy over there.”
I’m not a huge fan of sneaking pictures of people in public (yes I am), but I think I took your picture because I knew I needed time to process it all – more time than the situation would have allowed me to do.
We ran into each other around dinner time. I had just finished work for the day, and you had probably just gotten out of your job as a trapeze artist.